How to deal

I really wish I was able to update this blog more. It's not that things aren't going on - they always are - but it's just that I never want to take the time to sit down and write. I'm on the computer almost all day at work, so when I get home the last thing I want to do is sit in front of one again. That's my life.

Lately I've been very good at not thinking about the serious things in life. Both my dad and stepdad have major medical things going on right now. To be completely honest, I push those things into the farthest back corner of my mind that I possibly can. I don't know how I would function if I put them to the front of my mind and actually contemplated the "what if's" of both of them. I love them both so much and just cannot allow myself to think of the unimaginable. Perhaps it's denial and unhealthy, but it helps me to function at this point.

I feel like I need a change. A change of scenery, of pace...of something. My trip to NYC really convinced me that life is passing me by as I sit in my little office in Flint. I need to get out more, see more things - lead a fulfilling life. When the time comes for me to marry & settle down, I want to do so knowing that I lead an extraordinary single life. So far, I think I have. But there is much more that can be done and/or seen to make me feel fulfilled. I've thought about moving or changing jobs. They are going to post an international recruiter position here at UMF and I've thought about applying for that. But will a change of position that lets me travel a lot be what I'm looking for? Or do I just need to get out of Flint, period? I don't know. I'm back to the "I wish someone just handed me a silver platter telling me what to do with my life." Things will all work out, it just takes time.

The other day I realized that I'm getting very close to the limit on the mileage of my lease. I'm looking at 40,000 miles when I'm only allotted 45,000 and my lease goes until January. Yikes! Hopefully they will offer pull ahead in the next few months. I don't know what I want to get yet. I was very set on a Malibu previously, but now I'm not so sure. I will likely end up going with what is CHEAP. Sista' does not want to pay a fortune for a new car!

Can you believe that within a matter of days, it will be ten years since I graduated from high school?! This is so hard for me to believe. Sometimes when I think of how old I am, I just wonder where the time went! High school seems like ages ago, college flew by and it has now been five years since I graduated from WMU! I am so proud of my accomplishments, but I feel like I didn't take them in when I completed them...they all just flew by. I hope the next 10 years don't go by so fast. But then again, I am greatful for every event that took place in the last 10 years - I can only hope the next 10 will be just as good to me.

I'm taking my nephews up to my mom's this weekend for the long weekend. I think I'm a glutton for punishment, but we will see. The car ride there is the worst - everyone is pumped up and picking on each other. The way home - everyone sleeps. I often wish I could sleep during that 2 1/2 hour ride, but I'm not that lucky.

This is a boring post. Sorry. Life is good - just not all that exciting. Unless you count my cat getting into some oily substance and me having to rub her down with a wet washcloth and her trying to claw me to death, exciting. Or that I got a Blackberry and killed it within a week.

Peace out, bbs.